RIP My Sweet Boy

So in a month of really crappy days, today was, by far, the worst. I had to have my sweet sweet Hudson put down this morning because for the last two weeks the leukemia he had from birth decided to attack his bone marrow. This prevented his body from producing enough red blood cells to provide oxygen to his organs, so he was anemic and starting to have trouble breathing. He also contracted lymphoma, which is a cancer that attacks the white blood cells and it manifested on his skin. The vet said that he may have always had the lymphoma b/c he was always obsessively grooming himself, which is one of the most commonly overlooked symptoms.

In exactly 1 week he went from 8.5lbs to 7.1lbs because he stopped eating and became extremely lethargic, sitting on top of the fridge for hours on end. By this morning, he was no longer my Hudson. He used to run to me as soon as he heard my voice and as he got sicker, he started to just meow to let me know where he was. The last two-three days, he didn't even look up when I walked up to him.

I'm so grateful he's not suffering any longer, but I already

miss him so much. I miss him jumping in the shower with me or playing in the water while I'm doing the dishes. I miss wrapping him in a towel and cuddling with him for hours. I miss him jumping in the fridge and the dishwasher or sitting on the entertainment center and watching TV. I miss him following me around everywhere I go. I miss the 10:00 wrestling matches he had with Juno every night like clockwork. I miss him attacking my feet under the covers when I get in bed.

I miss my baby :(